Out of Her Head and Into the Movie
by Oriental Pirate
Summary: Crazy things that we as veiwers never saw: it all changes as Libby makes her presence known. She's in the Caribbean alright...but in a crazy outrageous rip-off. Rated for a bit of mild language as Libby learns pirate. Please R&R!
1. Prologue

Aloha everyone! Hope you like this!

Libby is my friend who I decided to put into this thing. Actually we had a couple of people running for this role but her name came out of the hat.

Dedicate this chapter to my ten goldfish.

Disclaimer: I do not own Libby or Hannah or Bry because they are real people. Nor do I own anyone who is in the movie. Plot is mine, look and don't touch. 

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Curse of the M&Ms

Libby and Hannah ran, screaming with laughter. The exhilaration of running down the corridor with M&Ms was pulsing through them and getting to their heads.

And not just any M&Ms.

Peanut M&Ms.

And not just any Peanut M&Ms, either.

"Give me back my Peanut M&M's!" Bry screamed, running after them.

Doors along the corridor opened and furious staff members came to see what all the noise was about.

"What the hell do you kids think you're – "

Libby and Hannah grabbed this opportunity dodged between one of the doors.

They were in the theatre. The room was already darkened and advertisements blared on the large screen.

"Grab a seat! She won't find us," Hannah giggled. She pulled Libby down just in time as a fuming Bry stomped into the cinema, looking for the most annoying people she'd ever agreed to go to the movies with. Only she saw a dark sea of heads and a few hundred eyes looking at her, eyeing her warily from the shadows, so she stomped out again.

"I can't believe it, we pulled it off," Libby slapped Hannah a high five.

The other patrons were all looking at them with mild exasperation, so they decided to shut up and eat.

.::::.

"These ads will never end," Libby muttered to Hannah about twenty minutes later, only getting the trail of Z Z Zs coming from her friend's head told her she wasn't going to get a response. She made a grab for the yellow bag, amazingly still full of delicious, chocolate-coated peanuts.

_-subliminal message flash-_

_delicious-chocolate-coated-peanuts-eat-peanut-m&ms-as-seen-on-tv-and-fanfiction-dot-net_

Only she knocked over the bag and the M&Ms rolled out. She tried to catch them but they fell through her fingers like sand.

"No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Libby ducked under the chairs and scrabbled around wildly for them.

.::::.

**Thunk.**

The patrons jerked awake. Something was beneath their seats. Something hiding in the shadows.

And they heard it.

"Find preciouss..."

.::::.

One...two...three... Libby picked them up as she crawled under people's seats.

There weren't just those M&Ms here – bits of forsaken food from centuries had made their way here. Gross-NESS. But life with a little brother had been enough training. Libby's eyes flicked past them with less thought than others might have.

Four...five...six

And one at arm's length. She got it and jumped up...

Except she banged her head on the seat above her instead.

"F..., piece of sh—s!"

Libby gripped her head. Fireworks sizzled through her head and stars winked at her. A few funny winged figures circled around her, and white feathers floated down.

And more feathers.

And more feathers...

Soon she was swimming in it.

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Hope you enjoyed that. I promise this is not going to be a "And then she woke up and it was all a dream" type story.

PS. Libby is allergic to peanuts, but this is a fiction so it is OK.


	2. A little reunion

Hi guys! :D back again. Thanks to Grittlebone, the first reviewer of this thing

Dedicate this chapter to hash browns because they are yummy, and because they are good topics for all phone calls. Prank calls in particular, :P

Disclaimer still applies.

_

* * *

_A Little Reunion

_Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..._

Libby started to mumble the song as she gained consciousness...and swallowed a mouthful of water.

"Just keep – cough-cough _glug-glug_."

Libby jerked awake. She was surrounded by water! And she was sure she hadn't wet herself. She sputtered as she looked around. She was in some kind of harbor full of tied ships, next to a cliff.

Libby's head began to swim, taking over because she couldn't, she was too dazed. She sank...

Just before she slipped into the heavy sleep of drowning she felt strong arms grab her and pull her up.

She heard lots of gasps around her as she was placed gently on the jetty. She sat up and looked around.

"Two unfortunate swimmers in one day!" came a faintly familiar voice. "My word. Elizabeth dear, was this child there too?"

"No, Father," said another familiar voice. "I've not seen him until now."

Libby sat up. She was surrounded by a bunch of people in both very outdated clothes. The people in the clothes looked very familiar. But she was still in a daze.

"Where am I?" Libby asked weakly.

"All right, young lad?" An ugly guy with white hair looked down at her. "What be thee doing, frolicking around then?"

"What?" Libby blinked and rubbed her eyes. Norrington? What the heck?!

"What the hell were you doing swimming in that water," a husky voice explained. Libby recognized it instantly and turned to face him.

The young woman who she had heard before turned to him in disgust. "Blasphemy, sir! Much as I am grateful for your rescue, I am appalled."

"Ja...Ja...Jac, Oh, my God, JACK SPARROW?!?!" Libby shrieked and coughed up about a bucketful of sea water and eels.

The young woman stared, aghast. "Your language! Such a child."

"Aha!" Said Norrington to Libby's favourite movie character ever. "You are a pirate!"

Jack looked annoyed. "I am Mr. Smith. I will not be insulted by such... such, oh what the hell. What are you going to do?"

Norrington looked triumphant. He turned to Libby, who was getting to her feet and squeezing water and small fish from her hair.

"And YOU, lad, must be a pirate too, for you know this man."

The Governor glared at her. "Am I to assume you know Jack Sparrow, young man?"

Libby gave a small laugh of disbelief. "Everybody knows him! I... Hey, I'm a girl!"

Everybody gasped again. Jack raised an eyebrow, looking pleased that another person knew about him and obviously thought everyone else did too. Norrington looked thunderstruck.

"Impossible," Elizabeth murmered.

"That... what... then, well... HOWEVER," he sputtered. "Your clothes do not indicate so."

Libby looked down. Of course, she was wearing jeans. She had to smile.

"I'm wearing pants. So shoot me."

Now even Jack looked confused. Norrington prodded his gun looking puzzled. Elizabeth looked incredulous and the Governor blinked. "Miss?"

"I mean, er, are you really going to shoot me because I wear pants," She amended. What a day. Sarcasm was going to be pretty scarce.

"Well then young lady," the Gov said. He went very red. "Would you kindly go... go... and... cover up."

What! Did her top fall off or something? Libby checked herself twice. "Why? I'm wearing a T-shirt."

Jack grinned. This little lass had nerve, running around in what looked like undergarments and mens' wear

"Then, young lady," The Governor continued, now looking anywhere but at her. "May you kindly explain why you were frolicking about."

"So was she," Libby pointed to Elizabeth.

 Elizabeth was affronted.

"_I_ fell because of that corset. I couldn't breathe."

"Well I whacked my head on something," Libby said truthfully. "And I found myself swimming. Then Jack must have saved me after he saved you."

"Oh yes... Jack Sparrow." The Governor turned to the pirate and snarled. "Shoot him!"

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More chappies coming!! Please review!

PS. Libby CAN swim. And also she has a haircut which is really cool and something the Victorians wouldn't dream of giving their daughters.


	3. More Reunions

A Little Reunion Continued and Another Little Reunion

Libby froze, hoping like heck that her presence wouldn't alter the plot.

"Father. Ugly... I mean Commodore." Elizabeth stepped between the armed men and Jack. "Do you really intend to blow his head off?"

Libby stared.

"Yeah, and I got a lawyer," Jack added, peeping out from behind Elizabeth.

"Well too bad 'cos I bribed the judge," Norrington said smugly.

The Governor scowled. "So that's how you got away with stealing my stash..."

"Father!" Elizabeth gasped.

"I mean, er, cash. Ahem. Now as for this pirate –"

"He saved both our lives," Libby put in.

"She's got a point there," Jack said hopefully.

"Children should be seen and not heard. Arguing is not a good thing, you naughty little girl who runs around in knickers and men's wear," Norrington seethed.

"I am _not_ a little girl!" Libby flared, drawing herself to her full height. "I'm thirteen. I am turning fourteen, like, in a few months."

Looking worried, Elizabeth walked past Libby casually to contemplate whether she'd actually grown or not.

"Well I believe thanks are in order," Norry said, sticking his hand out for Jack to shake and then hopefully have a look at his wrist and steal his watch.

"What's the point? You already know he's a pirate," Libby said.

The was a silence, if you ignored the snickers and "Bummed!" aimed at the ugly commodore.

"I knew it!" Norrington shouted, glaring at Libby and looking at Jack's gold watch sadly.

"Forgive this idiot and shoot that pirate," The governor told his men.

Jack grabbed Libby, because Elizabeth had walked just out of reach.

"I change my mind," The Gov said hastily.

"It's Elizabeth, isn't it?" Jack smirked.

"No, Libby is actually short for Olivia," Libby smiled.

"Let go of her you pedophile," Elizabeth shrieked.

"Oh fine," Jack rolled his eyes as he let go of Libby, who made a mental note to get Elizabeth. "Just remember that this is the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!"

And he did lots of clever tricks and ran off. The Governor let out a huff of disgust, Norrington looked furious as he ran after the pirate. Elizabeth gasped and Libby stood there, gawking and feeling a sense of yayness.

Jack turned his signals on right, and went left instead. The men were fooled and ran off and Jack ran into the forge.

Then he saw a donkey. Only he left it alone because nobody had handcuffed him.

There was nothing else to do here except steal some swords.

Feeling extremely bored he rode on the donkey for a bit until the door creaked open.

Jack hid under the donkey and watched warily. It wasn't the blacksmith.

"I know you're here," the new person called. She tiptoed in and peered around. Complete with disgusting smells, the place was pretty outrageous.

Now where had Jack hid in the movie?

Suddenly she smelt something distinctly like donkey pee. There was lots of cussing and Jack stood up.

"Bloody animal," Jack wiped his brow. "What are you looking at?"

"Nothing," Libby blushed.

Jack grabbed a sword. Then he remembered that this guy was actually a girl (better than a eunuch, anyway) and thought better of it.

"So," Jack said.

"Yeah," Libby said.

Then the door opened again and Will came in.

"Not where I left you," he said to the donkey. Then he noticed the two of them.

"Who are you?"

"ORLANDO BLOOM!" Libby shrieked. Oh her God, Oh her God. Really and truly at last.

Will scratched his head, puzzled. "Alrighty then, Orlando. Then who are you?"

Jack tried to look as dignified as he possibly could squeezing yellow stuff from his dreads.

"I am a pirate."

This caused Will to have a hissy fit and they started a cat fight.

Libby just looked on, not knowing which gorgeous fencer to cheer for.

Then Norry's men came banging on the door, ever so pissed at being led off in another direction by Jack.

"You're under arrest for the misuse of traffic signals!" Norry yelled.

The ugly fat guy who had been asleep got up.

Libby fainted from his stench, and only heard a dim clunk as what she recognized Jack being whacked over the head before she slipped once again into unconsciousness.


	4. The Miserable Jail

Drum roll

Chappie FOUR! Yay

Dedicate this to all theother parodies on this site because they rule, and you reviewers. :D

I disclaim everything. Although I willsteal Libby's soul someday soon, mwaha.

* * *

The Miserable Prison

Libby woke blearily to the sounds of whistles and "Here, doggy, nice doggy," and "COME HERE YOU MUTT!'

"You can keep doing that forever, that dog is never going to move," She heard Jack say boredly.

"And why would that be?" the other prisoners retorted.

"Considering that you've been coaxing it for the last five hours..."

Libby got up. She was in the same cell as Jack. They had taken her for a pirate! This sort of thing was probably more of a Meg-type thing. (Yesh, Yours Truly. )

"Up now, are you?" Jack nodded at her.

"Little runty pirate," the other prisoners snickered.

"That's Miss Runty Pirate to you," Libby snapped.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," The prisoner looked scared.

Outside, some guns went off, and there was the sound of blasting and swearing and more blasting, and a _thunk,_ then Norrington going "OW!" and more swearing.

"The Black Pearl!" Libby gasped.

Jack glanced at her, surprised. "How'd you kn-?"

"I hear there aren't ever any survivors where that ship raids," a prisoner said.

"Wonderful and cheerful," Libby said.

"Where do they get the stories from, then?" Jack said smugly.

"People like him," Libby grinned.

Jack was amused. The prisoner scowled.

"I'm not making up stories!" he said hotly.

Then a big cannonball burst through the wall of their cell. ("Pardon me," said a prisoner sheepishly) and they whooped and escaped.

Jack and Libby, however, were still trapped.

"Fantastic," Jack muttered. He looked out where the dog was sitting.

Only before he could be a hypocrite, the dog swallowed the key and ran off, barking joyfully.

Jack swore.

Libby was about to say some comforting words when two guys came.

"Well, well, well!" said one pirate. "Jack Sparrow, isn't it?"

"Yes he is Jack Sparrow but we are not well at all," Libby spat at them.

"You can say that again, lass," Jack laughed hollowly.

The two guys stared. "That runt be a lass?"

"Yes I be... I mean yes I am!" Libby said furiously. She was getting sick of this gender confusion.

The two pirates looked terrified and ran off.

"Hell," Jack said, laughing.

"You know nothing of hell," Libby muttered.

It could hardly be considered hell; she was going to be locked in the same jail cell as Captain Jack Sparrow until next morning.

"How'd you know that was the Black Pearl?" Jack raised his eyebrows, which disappeared into his red bandanna.

All right. Say something impressive now and get him to admire her for ever!

"I just know," Libby said proudly.

"Right."

"Er, I mean, I know everything," she added mysteriously.

That did the trick.

"Do you, now," Jack gave his grin. He surveyed this weird kid. "Are you a witch then?"

"Yeah, totally." Then Libby remembered about how sarcasm wasn't really going to get her anywhere, and how the olden-day people were supposed to believe and fear witches. "All right, I'm kidding. I just know lots of things."

"Are you even a pirate?" Jack demanded.

"No," said Libby.

"How'd you end up in the harbour?"

"What's this, twenty questions?"

"Not quite, love. Just four."

Libby was tempted for him to repeat that. Especially the _love_.

"OK. I'll start from the beginning. I was watching this movie, right."

"In English please." Jack was mildly quizzical.

A world without films was a difficult one indeed. "Oh man, how do I explain this..."

"So you can't do it in English," Jack smirked.

"Yes I can! To put it shortly, I whacked my head and ended up swimming." Libby said exasperatedly.

"So you were thrown overboard," Jack deducted.

"I wasn't even on a ship. I was... I was... I was... I was in a perfectly safe dry building."

"Only you were knocked out," Jack said dryly. "That is indeed jolly. So now I could be a figment of your imagination."

"You could be," Libby nodded. Always the philosophical one.

"I appreciate that." Jack looked sulky. He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.

"Don't cry," Libby was bewildered.

"I'm not crying!!!!" Jack's outlined eyes snapped open.

"Sure you're not."

"Go to sleep."

"You're not my babysitter."

Jack looked extremely irritated. "Listen, love, why don't I just knock you out?"

"All right! Don't kill me." Libby hastily nestled into a corner.

"Good."

-

"You! Pirates!"

Libby woke again for the third time this parody. Will Turner was staring at them behind the bars.

"Will Turner!" Libby gasped, remembering that she wasn't in a studio.

"Oh, that's your name, is it?" Jack smiled. "Named after your dad, eh?"

"That's right, you." Will scowled at Jack.

"Captain Jack Sparrow." Jack corrected.

"Whatever! Tell me where that ship's headed."

"Well get me out first and I'll show you."

"I'm not going to help scum like you," Will snarled.

"Will! Please," Libby begged. The whole story seemed to be going wrong, slowly but surely.

"Mr. Bloom," Willrounded on Libby crossly.

"That would be Miss Runty Pirate," Jack corrected.

Will stared. "I thought you said you were Orlando –?"

"Just get us the hell out of here!" Libby said, now extremely annoyed.

Now absolutely nonplussed and a little scared, Will said "OK, then," dazedly and did as he was told.

* * *

I would like you all to bear in mind that Libby doesn't really look like a boy.

(Above message was for my own mortal wellbeing.)

Keep the reviews coming!!


	5. Sailing, Sailing

Avast me mates! Yeah I know it's been quite a while.

Dedicate this chapter to the wonderful game of Charades!

Disclaimer still applies (...dammit)

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Sailing, Sailing

Shortly afterwards they managed to sneak onto the big ship.

"Well, Love. And The Willy," Jack smirked. "Here we are."

"Aye aye, Captain," Libby said happily.

"My name is not The Willy. And stop calling him Love, it's making the rest of us sick." Will scowled.

"For bloody sake, I'm a girl!" Libby said crossly. This guy was nowhere near as nice as the movie had portrayed. (And my dear readers, don't throw tomatoes at me.)

"But you said your name was Orlando Bloom – "

"Forget what I said before! It's LIBBY. My name is LIBBY. Got it?"

"Stop arguing you idiots," Jack said politely.

"I am not an idiot, Jack." Will seethed. "You knew my father." (Award goes to him for Most Random Statement of the Year).

"Yeah, he was a pirate," Jack smiled, seeing how much he could wind him up.

Will went redder than a Coca Cola bottle cap. "My pa was not a pirate!"

Jack looked at him scornfully. "Yes he was."

"No he wasn't!!!"

"He was!" Libby chimed in.

Both Jack and Will stared at her.

"How'd you know?" They both demanded.

"I'm psychic. Your dad was Bootstrap Bill."

"Told you so!" Jack said smugly.

"Oh shut up the both of you," Will began to sulk. "Ganging up on me you bloody bullies…"

Jack turned around and began to twiddle with the wheel. Libby knew what was coming and ducked.

Suddenly the boom swung around, catching Will and he dangled over the churning waters.

"Hey!!"

"Take that back," Jack said mildly.

"I take that back!"

"Say 'Jack is not a bloody bully.'"

"Jack is not a bloody bully! Jack is not a bloody bully!"

"And neither is the Runty One."

"And neither – SQUAWK."

Will tossed the random parrot into the water ("Runty One! Runty One!") and glowered at the pirate.

"I hate you two!" He shouted.

Libby felt really bad now. Jack, however, smiled, gave a wobbly bow and proceeded to sail to Tortuga.

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Short, I know. Hope this speeds up the process of updating. :P 

Please review!!!


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